Tuesday, July 17, 2007

Summer Of '69

I got my first real six string
Bought it at the five and dime
Played 'til my fingers bled

It was the summer of '69

Me and some guys from school
Had a band and we tried real hard
Jimmy quit and Jody got married
I shoulda known we'd never get far

But when I look back now
The summer seems to last forever
And if I had the choice
Ya, I'd always wanna be there
Those were the best days of my life
Ain't no use in complaining
When you got a job to do
Spent my evening down at the drive in
And that's when I met you, Ya

Standing on a mama's porch
You told me that you'd wait forever
And when you held my hand
I knew that it was now or never
Those were the best days of my life

Back in the summer of '69

Ya, Man we were killing time
We were young and restless
We needed to unwind
I guess nothing can last forever, Ya

And now the times are changing
Look at everything that's come and gone
Sometimes when I play my old six string
I think about ya wonder what went wrong

Standing on a mama's porch
You told me it would last forever
And the way you held my hand
I knew that it was now or never
Those were the best days of my life

Back in summer of '69

Friday, July 13, 2007

Satir's Conceptual Framework

1) The Family Of Origin's Influence
Our family of origin, including past generation, has a significant influence on our attitudes and behaviors.

2) Families As System
Families are systems and as such seek balance; when that balance is maintained through inappropiate roles, restrictive rules, and/or unrealistic expectations, the members needs will not be met and dysfunction will occur.

3) Low Self Esteem
The result of dysfuctional family system is low self esteem and defensive behavior, as the basic drive of human beings is to enhance self esteem and defence against threats to it.

4) Resources Of The Whole Person
Each person contains all the resources one needs for growth and healthy functioning.

5) The Process Approach
Growth is always possible and is most effectively facilitated by intervening at the level of "process" rather than "content".

6)The Process Of Change
The process of change is universal and involves stages.

Thursday, July 12, 2007

4 Defensive Communication Styles From Virginia Satir

1) Placating
When we placate, we disregard our own feelings of worth, hand our power to someone else, and say yes to everything. Placating masquerades as pleasing, a highly acceptable act in most cultures and families. However, Placating differs from a congruent attempt to please. We placate at the expense of self worth. Placating denied our self respect and give people the message that we are not important. We insist on taking the blame for the things that go wrong. We take responsibility even if we have to go to exaggerated lengths to find evidence of our errors.

2) Blaming
Blaming is diametrically opposed to placating, The Blaming stance is an incongruent way of reflecting society's rules that we should stand up for ourselves and not accept excuses, inconvenience, or abuse from anyone. We must not be "weak". To protect ourselves , we harass and accuse other people of circumstances. To Blame is to discount others.

3) Super Reasonable
The Super Reasonable pattern of communicating discounts the self and the other person. Being overly reasonable means functioning with respect to context only, most frequently at the level of data and logic. We do not allow ourselves or others to focus on feelings. This reflects society's rule that maturity means not moving, looking, touching or feeling emotions.

4) Irrelevant
The fourth survival stance is being Irrelevant, commonly confused with being amusing or clownish. The Irrelevant pattern is the antithesis of the Super Reasonable one. When people are Irrelevant, they move continually. This is an attempt to distract people's attention from the issue under discussion. They keep changing their ideas and want to do myraid activities simultaneously.